Mera Joota hai ....

Japani Samosa in Chandni Chowk (a place i visited for the first time this saturday) got me thinking about Japan and Japanese terms in general? Here's a primer of what i have understood so far ...

1. Sushi = fish that is priced in inverse proportion to the thickness of the slice.
2. Sumo = A nearly indestructible Tata exported SUV that so impressed the Japanese that they have people eating a whole lot to attempt equaling its weight and strength.
3. Sony = Sindhi pet name. Originally manufactured in USA (Maharashtra) – later opened branch in Tokyo.
4. Harakiri = logical career progression move for American finance company CFOs, often taken up after the firm is nationalized.
5. Karaoke = Discovery of singing talent after enough sake has flown ….
6. Vaio = Pronounced Why Oh. Short for Why oh Why did you have to put your paycheck down the toilet for a machine that doesn’t connect with anything at all.
7. Bonsai = Small tree useful for meditation to achieve breakthrough strategies by enlightenment. Often seen in Japanese boardrooms (on top of the sake cabinets). Breakthrough products have been invented after such sessions, one example is 360 degree camera as seen here: http://gizmodo.com/gadgets/gadgets/top-12-failed-japanese-inventions-241312.php.
8. Shin-ka-sen = Bengali bhadralok member confusing his running speed with the bullet train, running hard resulting in ow, ow, ow … my shin hurts.
9. The Ring = Inspirational film often shown to schoolchildren in Japan after they’ve walked two miles in the snow to reach class.
10. Pokemon = Short for poke-me-hon. Cry of disillusionment uttered by American dads after opening the box and seeing how small the toy actually is compared to the large hole burnt in the wallet.
11. San = a Japanese honorific term that is applied to names, e.g. San Diego.
12. Samurai = Tom cruise’s illusion that he can look like Christian bale if he dresses up in armor.
13. Las Vegas = Holiest pilgrimage place for the rich Japanese – donations can be made at any temple such as Bellagio, Luxor, etc.
14. Disneyland = Second holiest pilgrimage.
15. Kamikaze = Airplane landing technique adopted by Japanese, pioneered by Air India.
14. Yakuza = Grooming school for your talented Japanese adolescent